


Something, Something C-3PO

by MissThreepsnsfw



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Forced Pregnancy, Gay Robots, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Mpreg, Multi, Omega Verse, Robot Sex, Smut, The Author Regrets Everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-20
Updated: 2019-11-20
Packaged: 2021-02-16 06:34:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,883
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21503455
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissThreepsnsfw/pseuds/MissThreepsnsfw
Summary: My one-shot collection of C-3PO/R2-D2 stuff.My gift, from one horny person to the masses of horny people.
Relationships: C-3PO/R2-D2
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	1. Droids in Heat?!?

It was a windy day on the forest planet of Yavin 4. Blades of multicolored grass and leaves rustled in the warm breeze, making music throughout the forests and base. The tall trees loomed over the forest floor, casting ghostly shadows here and there. Their trunks creaking in the midday sun filled the forest with baritone notes. Strange birds flew around, their songs pleasantly adding to the forest chords. The scent of moss and large fruits hanging from the trees filled the air with a pleasant perfume. All was calm and alive. The peace radiating from the forests of the planet filled the rebel base with good cheer and calm vibes. The whir of starfighters hummed in the background. The heartbeat of boots on stone pulsed around the rocky base, keeping the base alive and running. The thunder of engines, the crackles of electricity was a storm inside the base. 

Underneath an orange, pockmarked, battle-scarred X-wing, a squat little droid worked feverishly. Tools were pushed into the underbelly of the ship, zapping and welding parts together. It was not fun, but it was honest work. The droid would occasionally roll out from under the ship and unfold into his human form. He would get a drink of water or a protein bar and get back to work. He also did some work using his human body. His silver hair dripped with sweat, his dark skin shiny with grease. He perched his goggles on his nose as he worked with smaller parts and fragile wires and screws. The heat of the day made the old hangar feel stuffy and humid, but good ol’ Artoo Detoo kept working. 

He looked outside the hangar as he took a break and watched Pilot Han Solo and General Leia argue about something that seemed stupid to the little droid. But he kept watching, General Leia pushing Pilot Han aside and Han giving her a puppy dog face. They ended up kissing passionately in the end and walking away, hand in hand. 

“It’s always something. Something bothering her, something messing with him,” Artoo sighed, sitting under the ship in a crosslegged position. His black trenchcoat fluttered around him in the light breeze, like a shiny caged crow. He grabbed a water bottle and took a drink, savoring its crisp, cool, refreshing feeling as it flowed down his throat. 

“Oh Artoo, Artoo Detoo,” a pompous voice called out from behind him. The short man stood up but banged his head on the underbelly of the starfighter.

“I’m here,” he rubbed his head, wincing in pain. He crawled out from under the ship, still covered in grease an oil. He trotted up to a taller man, who instantly smiled seeing Artoo. 

“Mistress Leia needs us tonight, I just wanted to let you know,” the taller man said, his golden eyes flashing behind his large circle lensed glasses. He adjusted his golden overcoat in an uneasy way, and a blush covered his pale cheekbones. 

“Something tells me there is way more than just that you wanna tell me. Come on, let's go to our quarters.” Artoo took the taller man’s hand, and lead him down a series of hallways and rooms. The taller man, also known as C-3PO or Threepio, didn’t speak a word. That was not normal, due to the known fact he always had something to say. 

As they approached their quarters, C-3PO suddenly pushed the sweaty, oilily man into a wall. His breathing was rough, and sweat was dripping from his golden hair. 

“Artoo, you’ve gotta help me,” his voice was hoarse, and he seemed to be panting. His eyes seemed crazed, red around the corners and pupils only little pinpricks. 

“Holy shit, Threepio. What’s going on?” Artoo asked, trying to push the larger man off of him. 

“I can’t turn back. I just can’t.” Threepio moaned, “I‘ve tried and tried but it’s not working.”

“What do you mean? You can’t turn to your droid form?” Artoo asked, raising an eyebrow at the golden man. 

“Exactly!” Threepio wheezed, “I have a slight suspicion about why.” Threepio’s eyes clenched together, and he sat on the ground. 

“What is wrong Threepio? Are you dying?” Artoo found himself slipping into his droid form and zapping Threepio’s leg.

“Just scan me and tell me yah you see!” C-3PO growled. Artoo was already way ahead of the man. He didn’t see anything, in particular, that was standing out. But when he looked at the internal temperature of his lover, he noticed that it was soaring high.

“So, you’ve got a fever. Don’t we all?” Artoo stood up, pushing his silver hair out of his face. He looked over Threepio with his bright blue eyes, still suspicious. 

“It’s not that simple Artoo,” C-3PO strained out, veins bulging in his neck, “I’ve got important business to deal with tomorrow that requires my droid form! I’m a translator!” He was yelling at the top of his voice, “I need to get better!”

“Ah, you could have just told me. You were acting like you were going into heat.” Artoo laughed, patting Threepio’s back, “don’t worry ol’ buddy, I’ll get yah better.” Artoo helped the taller man up and they walked to their quarters. Threepio laid down on the bed, shivering.

“I think you got it all wrong Artoo,” Threepio moaned.

“What?” Artoo asked, grabbing some more blankets from a shelf. 

“I am in heat.”

“Hold up, what?” Artoo dropped the blankets, his jaw-dropping. 

“You heard right, you deaf wamp-rat!” Threepio snapped, trying to keep his shivering at a minimum. Artoo shook his head, his eyes bulging. 

“I didn’t think humans, or droids, could-”

“I guess there are these things called ‘omega’ dynamics.” C-3PO tried to explain, “There are alphas, betas, and omegas.” 

“Like wolves?” Artoo asked. He was picking up the blankets and placing them at the end of the bed. He then walked to the little bathroom and washed the oil and grime off his face and hands. 

“I think so.” Threepio thought, shaking his golden bangs out of his face, “And I guess Alpha’s are well, you know,” Threepio blushed.

“Betas can impregnate and also have children, and omegas have children.” Artoo said, rolling his eyes, “I know a little bit about this stuff.” He sat down on the edge of the bed, looking Threepio dead in the eyes. “So, you’re a beta or something like that?”

“I’m an omega, I guess.” Threepio looked away.

“Why didn’t you tell me?!” Artoo yelled, throwing his hands down. 

“Because I didn’t know!” Threepio through his hands up. 

“Well, now we know.” Artoo sighed, shaking his head in a disappointed manner, “I never really thought any of that omega bullshit was real. But now,” Artoo laughed, “needa good fucking or else?”Artoo got confused, “what does happen?”

“Uh, I get ill,” C-3PO thought, “And I might, well, perish.” 

“We gotta do something!” Artoo began to panic, his face filled with fear, “Do you need any medicine or something?” The little man became frantic, his eyes bulging out of their sockets. 

“Artoo, can I put this bluntly?” C-3PO sighed, sweat falling down his brown, “Artoo Detoo, I need you to, as you say, fuck me.”

Artoo Detoo went as read as a Nabooian tomato. But something also began to tent up his trousers. He absentmindedly put a hand to his crotch as he looked at Threepio, panting and red. Many images of very enjoyable scenarios popped into Artoo’s head. One’s that were sure to put the horn in horny. He started to walk over to the bed, were Threepio posed in a very sexy position. He instantly dropped his pants and through off his ebony trenchcoat. Threepio purred at him, a strange noise to be heard out of the pompous protocol droid. 

Artoo pulled down Threepio’s pants with flare, and almost tore off the man's shirt. He rubbed Threepio’s chest and belly, soothing circles on his boiling hot flesh. Artoo then began to play with Threepio's chest and nipples, making him shiver with ecstasy. 

“You like that?” Artoo asked, giving him a dominant look. Threepio moaned, most likely a yes. Artoo kept going, and started to align himself with Threepio’s ‘mangina’.

“Oh, be gentle Artoo,” Threepio moaned. Then Artoo rammed himself into Threepio, making the golden man gasp with suprise and pleasure. Threepio’s back arched a little, pleasure filling his body.

“Damn you’re tight, you sure you ain’t a virgin?” Artoo panted, sweat beading up on his forehead.

“Remember how we did this after our wedding?” Threepio moaned, Artoo then hit what most likely was Threepio's g spot, making him kick his legs a little, “oh please, right there-oh!” Artoo rocked back and forth, making Threepio pant and moan with pleasure.

“Ah- I’m coming!” Threepio yelled, his back arching with orgasm. His legs stiffed as Artoo released himself in the golden man, full of pleasure to the breaking point.

Soon it was all done and the two were laying on the bed, sweaty and smiling. They were cuddled together, Artoo slowly spooning Threepio. 

“Mmm, that was good,” Threepio panted, his temperature going down. His cheeks still had a distinct blush, and his hair needed a good combing. 

“That sure was babe.” Artoo kissed Threepio’s forehead, taking some of the heat.

“Artoo, did you use protection?” 

“No, is that bad?” Artoo asked, unsure.

“I have a bad feeling about this.”


	2. God Damn It- Robo Mpreg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Late Nite+Horny+Reading C-3PO Vore?!  
> =This load of shit
> 
> I wrote this to add onto the whole 'put Threepio in a fetishy situmation' like vore (read Human and Cyborg Vorelations)

“Anakin, the babies cannot be born yet, but Padme is in no shape to bear them.”

“Well, what can we do? I may be an ex-Jedi ex-Sith sorta thing, but I have no clue what to do.”

“Well, what about that golden protocol droid over there?”

“C-3PO? What do you mean?”

“We could make an artificial uterus and place the twins in them, and in a few months they’ll be born in a normalish way.”

“You’re suggesting C-3PO carries my children.”

“Yes. it may be the only way to save them.”

“Fine. Do it.”

“Oh my, a special mission!” C-3PO cheered, his golden face shining, “how wonderful! Artoo! I have a special mission from Master Anakin!”

“*Sure, whoopie do. Hey, I’m impressed,*” Artoo whistled, sarcasm filling his binary voice.

“I wonder what it is, it sounds wonderful indeed!” C-3PO and R2-D2 were going down a hallway to a room Anakin Skywalker told them to go to. They reached the door, and Artoo opened the door with his rod. 

“Whoa there, we just need the golden droid.” a man said, backing the little R2 unit away. Artoo squawked at him, but the humans didn’t understand.

“It will be alright, dear friend.” Threepio said, patting Artoo’s dome. Artoo sighed, and rolled off.

“He sure is very clingy.” one of the men in the room said, rolling his eyes.

“He sure is,” C-3PO smiled inwardly, “So, what’s my mission?”

“Simple. Carry twins for three months, then give birth to them. And who knows- Anakin may have you do it again.” a man laughed, looking at a chart of some sorts. 

C-3PO stood there in shock.

“Can I, opt out or something?” he squeaked out, his internal fans whirring crazily.

“Nope.” a man shocked him, and two men caught the golden droid as he fell. They then took the droid and began their duties.

“Whoa! Where am I?” C-3PO jolted up. He was laying on what looked like a recovery bed. He looked to his left and noticed Padme, pale and ill. To his right was what looked like some schematics of his body.

“Something’s different.” C-3PO looked around, groggy in only a way a droid can be. He ran some scans of his body, and everything was alright. But there were a few new parts, some he had never heard of.

“What’s a HTD Utero Simulator?” C-3PO mumbled to himself.

“*Hey-lo Babe!*” a familiar binary voice chirped. C-3PO looked at his bedside and saw squat little Artoo Detoo. 

“Hello Artoo,” C-3PO warmly said, “Can you tell me what’s going on?”

“*Simple,*” Artoo laughed, “*you’ve been knocked up!*”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Threepio asked, his stress levels becoming high. An alert then flashed in his head, something about stress levels and needing to calm. “What is this all about?!”

“C-3PO, my loyal droid,” a familiar voice said, “How are you feeling?” It was Anakin Skywalker, ex-Jedi and ex-Sith.

“I’m not well Master.” Threepio said angrily. He got out of the bed and tried to stand up. But he sat down, feeling unbalanced and woosy. 

“Chill Threepio!” Anakin snapped, pushing Threepio to lay down. “You’ve become an, er, incubator for my twins.”

“Incubator, twins,” Threepio gasped with surprise and horror, “I’m pregnant?!” Threepio looked at his middle and noticed why he was so unbalanced. A bunch of his plating was replaced by black rubber, which was distended greatly. 

“*Haha! You’re fat now!*” Artoo laughed. Threepio tried to slap him, but he found himself being strapped down to the recovery bed.

“You’re going on bed rest Threepio.” Anakin snapped, becoming protective of his children. Threepio sighed, and placed a hand on his large middle. 

“How many months like this?” Threepio sobbed.

“*Three, Threepio.*” Artoo seemed to giggle, “*and you’re gonna be a lot bigger*.” Artoo tapped C-3PO’s swollen stomach. Threepio swatted away the droid, and rubbed his middle in a dazed way. 

“Twins, babies, bigger,” Threepio moaned, “I’m a surrogate.”

Three months later. 

“Artoo, can you please get me some oil over here? I’m starving!”

“Oh Artoo, rub my aching joints.”

“Ow! Artoo, they’re kicking again!”

That was just a few other things Artoo heard while taking care of Threepio. It was winter on Naboo, and the castles were covered in snow. 

In their own quarters, C-3PO and R2-D2 lazed around. Threepio was always sitting on a couch or chair, only getting up to shuffle over to another chair or sofa. Anakin and Padme worked on making the droid as comfortable as they could, which even making Artoo go on a ‘paternity’ leave.

“Please, Artoo, I’m starving,” Threepio moaned, sitting on a velveteen sofa with his feet propped up, “oh, and I think the twins are hungry too.” 

Artoo wheeled over, handing Threepio a small quart of oil and a vial of some vitamin substance Threepio ingested for the children. Threepio didn’t even finish his thanks to Artoo before he started to consume the oil and substance. Threepio began to go back into low power mode. He absent mindlessly rubbed his stomach, feeling the twins inside him move a little. 

He had grown a lot after two months. The twins were huge, and Threepio felt like he would burst. His belly was huge in his eyes, and he was unable to see his feet. Also walking was a huge no-no. He could barely shuffle around, his feet ached too much due to the weight and the lack of oil getting to his leg joints. 

But today was different. Threepio still felt heavy, but something as a little off. 

All the sudden, Threepio was crouched on the floor, oil dripping out of his mouth. 

“Artoo! Get help!” He yelled, his vision went blurry but also filled with warning messages. 

“*What’s wrong?*” Artoo whistled, frantic.

“I think the twins are coming!” Threepio grabbed his belly, feeling the contractions ripple through his fake uterus. He felt something warm and wet trickle down his legs, making him panic more.

“*Holy shit! I’ll get Anni!*” Artoo yelled, dashing out the door. 

A few minutes later, Anakin Skywalker, Padme, Artoo Detoo and Ahsoka ran into the room, faces full of shock and joy.

“Come on Threepio, you can do this!” Anakin had Threepio laying on the ground, trying his best to calm the droid. 

“Make it stop!” Threepio sobbed, grasping one of Artoo’s manipulators. 

“I’ve called medical.” Padme stood over them, holopad in hand, “They are about ready for him.” There was a room just set up for this event, so they were already prepared for this. 

Soon Obi Wan showed up with a wheelchair, and Anakin helped a blubbering Threepio into it. And as soon as they got him on it, they raced him around down to medical. 

“Push Threepio, try to push,” Padme stood over Threepio, watching the birth of her first born. Threepio moaned, still grasping Artoo’s manipulator as hard as he could.

“First one’s crowning.” A medical droid said, it’s monotone voice filling the room. Ahsoka and Obi Won waited outside, listening to Threepio’s screams.

Then everyone went quiet as a babies cry filled the room.

“It’s a girl.” The medical droid said, handing the first baby to Padme. Padme instantly wrapped up the child, and cooed at it as she walked to a corner of the room to clean off her new child.

“Leia, your name is Leia Skywalker.” Padme cooed over the yells of Threepio.

Soon, Luke Skywalker was born, and Threepio was cleaned up.

“It’s, it’s done?” Threepio asked, looking around. He was still holding Artoo’s manipulator arm, which was damaged by Threepio’s grasp.

“*Yes babe, it’s done.*”

“Where's the babies?” Threepio asked, sadness filling his voice.

“*Anni and Padme took them,*”

“I... I may of gotten attached to them,” Threepio mourned, covering his face with his hands, “I wanted to at least hold them,” He sobbed.

“*I bet we could have one of our own, but first, lets get your memory wiped.*”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I fucking hate myself for this XD


End file.
